zmstats.pl(8)

✨ zmstats.pl(8) ✨

okay so this is a page from the zoneminder manual, and it's about everyone's favorite lowkey background gremlin, zmstats.pl 💅

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🌸 NAME 🌸

zmstats.pl — the ZoneMinder Stats Updating Script 👑

like, that's literally her whole job title and she's serving it 🫶

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🦋 SYNOPSIS 🦋

zmstats.pl

no flags, no arguments, no drama — she takes zero input and just goes ✨

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💖 DESCRIPTION 💖

so bestie, here's the tea: this script does background updating of various stats in the db 💾 like event counts, diskspace, etc. 🎀

that's it. that's the whole vibe. she quietly keeps your numbers cute while you're out living your main character life 🌈 no cap, unglamorous work but iconic behavior fr fr 🧚

she does her thing in the background, so don't expect a parade or any output fanfare — she's lowkey about it 🙈

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aaand that's the page! 🍓 sign-off time: this little beauty is from zoneminder, dated 2026-03-04, and the footer even slips in a mysterious --stderr which we're just gonna admire from a distance 💀💜 mwah, go keep those stats slaying ⭐